Empty Nest

It's not just a day.....

 

ARTHUR T. BARRY
FIREMAN

A TRIBUTE

 

 

Its hard to remember.  Sometimes I don't want to but..I then remember the people, the so many of innocent people that died that day just doing what I was doing.  Going to work.  It's scary when you think of it.  So all I can say, with all my heart.....I am sorry, I hope you can keep going like you have the past 10 years and I will pray for everyone who lost someone that day adn those who managed to survive.

 

9/11

I know, I remember and I can't say anything to make it better.  It was awful, it still is awful and all I can say is God Bless America and I'm glad to be living right here.

A Day like no other.....

My daughter wrote this. She writes so much better than I do.  I hope she doesn't mind me using it. The first time she posted it was back in 2004 (2 yr anniversary).  Now it's been five years since that dreadful day.  The day I realized how lucky I was to work where I did/do and the day I realized that I have two of the most wonderful children on this earth.  Oh yeah, and God just plain didn't want me then..I am truly blessed. 

 

The Longest   Day Ever. Around 9am Central time. Two THREE FIVE years ago today. Answering a call at   work.   Me: This is Zoot.   Caller: in tears Zoot, This is L. from your mom’s office. I   don’t want you to freak out.   Me: What? What’s wrong with my mom?   Lisa: We don’t know yet. She’s on her way to the hospital.   Me: Oh my god. What’s going on?   Lisa: She didn’t come into work this morning. We kept calling on no   one would answer.   Me: Is she okay? IS. SHE. OKAY?   Lisa: I thinks she’s conscious. The guys from the warehouse went over   to her apartment. They forced themselves in and she was unconscious on the   floor. They called the ambulance. We have no idea yet what’s wrong with her.   Me: freaking - freaking and freaking some more Oh my god. What   should I do. Should I hit the road? Should I wait for a call?   Lisa: I don’t know Hon. But I’ll let you know if we hear anything. I’m   so sorry.   Me: I’m coming in town. Even if it turns out to be nothing. I’m coming   in. Here?s my cell number. Call me with ANY news. ANY news.     I call MrZ. I tell him what was going on and that I am heading to Knoxville.   I ask if he would meet me at home and help me pack. I decide to wait and call   my brother when I know more. He was in Seattle at the time, he would have to   fly in.   MrZ follows me around the house while I frantically throw items of   clothing into a suitcase for myself and LilZoot. I’m trying to concentrate on   not forgetting anything while giving MrZ instructions. He is writing down   phone numbers and names of family members he hasn’t even met. I am giving him   strict instructions to call my mom?s brothers and sisters and let them know   what was going on. I throw LilZoot and my stuff in the car?and we head north.   About 10 miles out of town, I get a call on my cell phone. Mom had an aneurysm.   She’s stable, but unwell. Blood in the brain. Possible heart attack. The   doctor will be calling you soon.   About 50 miles out of town. My phone rings again. This is Doctor So-In-So.   We need you to give consent to perform an angiogram on your mom so we can   survey the damage. I pull over. I listen to the doctor tell me the risks. I   give him my consent. He transfers me to a legal person who asks that I repeat   my consent. I do. It is very surreal. I’m watching cars pass me on the road,   I’m pulled off on the shoulder giving consent on a procedure to be done on my   sick mom. Very surreal.   About halfway. Doctor calls again. She’s had an aneurysm. I know that. But   its in a space in the tissue. We may have caught it in time before permanent   damage to the brain was sustained. But, we must stop the bleeding. She’s in   ICU. When will you be here? 2 hours? We’ll discuss options then.   I call my Dad. He’s in Knoxville. He and Mom divorced years ago - but he   needs to know. I tell him I’m on my way. I’ll go straight to the hospital.   I call my brother. He has a freak out session similar to mine. He’s flying   in. As soon as possible. He’ll fly into Nashville, rent a car, and drive to   Knoxville, it’s the quickest way.   MrZ calls me. Crying. I’m a bit confused. Why is he crying now? He just   talked to his Dad. His NaNa died in her sleep that morning. They had been   trying to call him at work, but he was home calling my family. I gave him my   sympathy and apologized for not being able to help him, and he felt bad for   not helping me. The next few weeks we would both go through some rough times,   but separately. It was tough on us. Bad luck to say the least. Please don’t   let this day get any worse.   Theres a huge cross on the hill on the outskirts of Knoxville. It’s been   there for awhile, I’ve seen it before. I take that time and pray to a god   I’ve not spoken to in years. Please. Let her be okay.   I get to the hospital. I’m still in my work clothes. Funny how I’ll always   remember what I wore that day.   I get to ICU. I can’t bring LilZ in, he’s too young. The nurses offer to   watch him while I go see Mom. She recognizes me but I’m terrified when I see   her hooked up. It shocks me so much I almost freeze. I was scared to touch   her. She smiles at me and say’s hello. She calls me by my full first name,   which no one ever does. This calms me a bit. It will be last time I hear her   say my name for over four weeks. She’s out of it, but cheeful, oddly enough.   I hold her hand. I wipe the sweat off her face. Mom always gets hot before   anyone else does. I ask the nurse if there is a fan they can bring in. They   are already on it.   They are calling the doctor. He will be here shortly.   My cousin John is driving my mom’s brother in from Nashville. My mom’s   sister Patty will be here too. I reassure them it?s not needed, but I?m glad   they are coming. My Dad meets me at the hospital to watch over LilZoot while   I meet with doctors and nurses. I’m feeling like a child all of the sudden.   Scared. Overwhelmed.   I speak to nurses. I get the full story from mom’s coworkers. I am now an   adult. Having a son didnt make me feel grown up. Discussing prodecures and   vitals with my mom’s nurses? That made me feel too adult. I wanted to be a   child again. I cant. My mom needs me.   I go see mom again. Now she thinks I’m her sister Sara. She’s asleep   again. The fan is here, she’s not sweating anymore. When is this damn doctor   going to be here?   Back to the waiting room to check on Dad and LilZ. My aunt and uncle and   cousin are here. We hug.   The doctor tells us the best option is coil embolization where they place   titanium coils in the aneurysm to stop the bleeding. Needs to be done at   Vanderbilt in Nashville. They don’t want to drive her - its too long of a   ride, she may not make it. They don’t want to chopper her, it will be too   bumpy. We’ll fly her in a jet. Sign this waiver saying that’s okay. My mom   boards her own personal jet.   Aunt Patty will fly with mom in the jet. I will drive LilZ to Nashville in   my car. Cousin John will drive uncle Jay back as well. Someone in Nashville   starts calling the airline to page my brother so he STAYS in Nashville.   We hit the road late. About 10pm or so. Mom’s is flying overhead. We all   meet up at Jay’s and Angie’s. My brother and I hug and laugh and prepare   ourselves for a long emotional journey. We drive downtown to Vanderbilt. They   let us in to see mom and meet the nursing staff. She’s been intubated. I   remember fearing that we might lose her and wishing my brother could have   heard her voice again. We went down to the main lobby and got an hour or so   sleep before the next day began.   July 22, 2002. The longest day of my life.   As you all know now. Mom is fine. 110% even; since today is also her   anniversary of quitting smoking! I’ll share the story of the following seven   weeks some other day. It was a challenging time for all of us. But it brought   us closer as a family and we got a second chance. We’ve made the most of it,   I believe. Here’s to all of her coworkers who actually thought to check on   her when she didnt show up. I don’t know about you guys, but my office would   NOT go to my home to check on ME! And they saved her life by doing that. Had   she been left there much longer, she would have died.   I love you mom. Here’s to having a better day this year!   7:52 am

1600 DAYS!!!

1600 Days ago..OMG. That's a long time.  1600 Days ago I nearly died.  Tried like hell too...Yep. Did try.  But.  I didn't. 
Evidently, sometime that morning, I had an aneurysm.  Here's the odd part.  I worked, at the time, for a rather small company.  We'd been working together for many years.  I didn't show up that morning.  That is something I've never done and one of my co-workers began calling me at home.  According to my answering machine, she made that call a lot of times.  She finally raised holy hell with the boss and told him something was wrong and they needed to go find me....and now!!  There were only about 13 people working there and we all knew each other pretty well.  So, the boss send one of the co-workers who could take the company truck, and off he went.  For this, I always thank god.  (would your job do that? go looking for you?).  He found me at home and he got in.  Evidently I had just let Maxi back in and dropped right inside the front door.  To make a long story short, considering I live alone and have no family here in town, goodness knows how long I'd have laid there until I died, or someone decided we'd better go find here. 
So, off to some "fighting for your life" experiences that I have no memory of, began the first of the next 1600 days that................I QUIT SMOKING....I know that living after an aneurysm is not terribly common and I had little control over that but I did have enough sense to not start smoking after I woke up from my coma.  I dont' really think my brain was terribly functional at the time but I do remember when Zoot said "You haven't had a cigarette in 3 weeks!!" I knew then, that this was the perfect time to make sure I stayed a non-smoker.  So I did.  Never picked another one up. 
Do I miss it?  Oh hell yeah.  Smoking was my bestest friend in the world.  I could take it anywhere and enjoy the hell out of each and everyone of them.  I also knew, that if I didn't quit then...right then and there, that I never would.   Wherever the hell the rest of my brain was at that time, I'm so grateful that there was enough there to keep me from smoking again.  So, on a day that was supposed to be nothing terribly special, I nearly died, didn't and then.....began the longest journey into giving up that other thing, that was going to kill me if the aneurysm didnt.   Happy 1600 days to me.
Happy Friday folks and have a nice weekend.

9/11

I'm going to leave the tribute to Artie up first all day. I want anyone who happens to stumble on my site to see the tribute to him. 
This day..It was awful, and the memory still is.  I remember darned near every single minute of that day.  I remember when sports talk radio guy Andrew said "Hey look, a plane has crashed into the World Trade Center"......That started it.  then a little bit later he said  "you know, this looks bad...really bad".  I still didn't put a lot of stock into it until my boss buzzed me and asked "Did you know about the plane crashing into the Towers?  Well, a second one has".....Now THAT got all of our attention..We all put our radios on "news" radio.
It was about 10 am that I decided to go home (live very close to work) and get my little TV....We watched all day.  The phones stopped ringing pretty much, we didn't have cable.  I do remember the best reception we could get was Peter Jennings.  He wasn't anyone's favorite. 
It was awful....Just awful.. but you know that.  we all know that.  Life is now different.  It will never be the same.  Today we remember all the people who lost their lives that day and pray for their families.  That's all we can do...

Remember when?

Guess what I watched last night (oh yeah BB...later on that). I was sitting here going through Comcast's "On Demand" and they have a Alfred Hitchcock category.  Right now you can watch Psycho, Vergito, Rear Window, Topaz and REBECCA!!.   I loved Rebecca, loved the book and so I watched it again. It had been so darned long since I had seen the movie that it might as well have been a first time.  It was fantastic.  I can't wait to watch the others.  Generally I haven't been thrilled with the "on demand" feature with Comcast but until I run out of AH movies I'll be just fine with it.   Gosh I loved that movie...and it also helped keep me awake for BB with started an hour later last night....and yes.  today is another 3 cupper....OHHHH SLEEP...please.
Ok BB.  (Kinda pales after Rebecca).  It was great don't you think?  And after seeing the "issue" over the dolls, it looked to me that James never had the correct doll.  It looked like they were fighting over the Howie doll not the Kaysar doll.  According to Jackie's last post it looks like James really might go.  That would be fine if you ask me.  I dislike him a lot.  I'd rather Will win than James.  I think, as far as the final three....I'm pulling for Janelle, George and Will.  If Janelle and George can pull that off, it finale would be most interesting don't you think?  I'm also thinking, if I was on that show...I'd toss Janelle as quick as I could.  She's way too popular.  So, as a non participant I want her to win, if I was a participant I'd want her gone and NOW..Thursday should be interesting, if James makes it without going nuts...
I've decided to NOT get the A/C fixed.  My budget is too strapped right now and its causing me all kinds of stress.  I'm not going to die or anything from the heat, no matter how hot it is so I'm going to let it go.  I slept a whole lot better last night not worrying about that.  Yeah me...
I loved "Rebecca"...."Vertigo" tonight maybe....

Missed my purple

I used a little purple on the 4th and realized I missed it.  And I missed my tulips so..here we are..Its summer and its tulip time............All plant people.  My very nice neighbor gave me a mother in law's tongue plant.  She said I needed one so ok...Now I have a question.. Take a look at these pictures and tell me if this plant is supposed to have these things or is it possessed by an alien life formt..........

I don't know if its pretty or weeds...HELP

Sorry Little Buddy

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
a tale of a fateful trip.
That started from this tropic port,
aboard this tiny ship.
The mate was a mighty sailin' man,
the skipper brave and sure.
Five passengers set sail that day,
for a three hour tour, a three hour tour………
The weather started getting rough,
the tiny ship was tossed.
If not for the courage of the fearless crew,
the Minnow would be lost; the Minnow would be lost.
The ship took ground on the shore of this uncharted desert isle,
with Gilligan, the Skipper too,
the Millionaire, and his Wife,
the Movie Star, the Professor and Mary Ann,
here on Gilligan's Isle.

So this is the tale of our castaways,
they're here for a long, long time.
They'll have to make the best of things,
it's an uphill climb.
The first mate and his skipper too,
will do their very best,
to make the others comfortable,
in the tropic island nest.
No phones, no lights, no motor cars,
not a single luxury.
Like Robinson Crusoe,
it's primitive as can be.
So join us here each week my friend,
you're sure to get a smile.
From seven stranded Castaways,
Here on Gilligan's Isle.

Bob Denver died today.  Not only will Gilligan be missed but for those of you my age...Maynard G Krebs will too.............He provided us with many laughs..Thanks

When we took a day cruise to the Bahamas' once, one of the girls just kept singing that damn song.  She was terrified we'd end up on Gilligans Island........

Nice Surprises...

I was over visiting Princess reading about how her first week at her new job went.  She remarked that when she got home on Friday she had roses from her sweetie and how wonderful that was..

I remembered once like that for me.  Most of you know about my little trip to coma land 3 years ago.. between Miss Zoot and Xzhibit I was taken very good care of.  Xzhibit came back home with me and stayed with me while I went on with therapy, found local doctor and became healthier enough to go back to work.  He was a godsend (I wasn't). 

Finally, it was the day for me to start back to work. I was going to start out working 3 days a week until noon.  Keep in mind, I had to get medical permission to even drive.  I had that but I hadn't driven very far so I asked Xzhibit if he would drive me in the morning for my first day..."Like yes Mom"...he left off the word dummy...

Well, I woke up, got ready for work and decided I could drive myself, that he didn't have to.  He kissed me and off I went.  The first day back was odd.  Good but odd.  I don't think I did anything awfully bad.  If I did, everyone was nice enough not to tell me.... I sure was tired at noon though and home I went. 

Xzhibit wasn't there when I got there, but I walked in the house and on the dining room table was the nicest arrangement of flowers I have ever seen. There was also a lovely card telling me how proud of me he was...I cried for about two hours...

Sometimes there just isn't anything better than having someone who loves you waiting for you when you get home...nothing..

One year ago today...

Did I ever tell you about my son in law?  Yes the MrZoot...He's so sweet and I'm so lucky that Miss Zoot married him....Last year, right before the start of the baseball season he got a brilliant (my opinion) idea..  Would I like it if he bought tickets to the Braves-Cubs game that was going to be played on the same day as the Masters tournament...  Understand this.  I love the Masters but THIS WAS THE CUBS...and I had never seen them in person so needless to say....yes was my answer.

So Maxi and I took off for Alabama on Good Friday...It was quite a weekend all around.....

Inauguration....

I just had a flashback.....Four years ago, I must have been home sick on inauguration day.  I remember watching all of the "festivities" and all the brou hahahah...........I'm not being political here but the funniest thing I still remember was ( I watched MSNBC) their coverage of Clinton leaving Washington. 

Now keep in mind I hadn't been home during the day much so I wasn't familiar with any of the cable news networks or the people on them.. There was a couple of references after the inauguration ceremony that Clinton really didn't want to leave Washington.. Well they went to like a breakfast thingy, and then Chris Mathews pointed out that Clinton had just arrived at the airport or something like that....more inauguration ceremonies, back to Clinton, still shaking hands, Mr. Mathews pointed out...Also pointed out that the plane had been warmed up and waiting for Clinton. 

Back to more ceremonies...back to Mathews, Clinton still shaking hands...and it seemed about 2 hrs after Clinton was supposed to leave, they came back to Mathews and he was laughing his a** off and the only thing he could say was "Heeeee'sss  still  heeeeere"

I laughed my you know what off.  For some reason I thought that was sooooo funny.  Clinton wasn't going easy, nopey not at all....I don't know if it was really funny or inauguration is soooo boring that anything would have been entertaining but that's my memory of the only other inauguration I've watched since JFK.........whew

OH SO TRUE...

TELL ME AIN'T THIS THE TRUTH


   TO THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 30's 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's
(and that means us)
      First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked
and/or drank while they carried us.
     They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing and didn't
get tested for diabetes.
     Then after that trauma, our baby cribs were covered with
bright colored lead-based paints.
     We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or
cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention,
the risks we took hitchhiking.
     As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or
air bags.
    Riding in the back of a pick up on a warm day was always
a special treat.
    We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a
bottle.
    We! shared one soft drink with four friends, from one
bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.
    We ate cupcakes, bread and butter and drank soda pop
with sugar in it, but we weren't overweight because WE WERE ALWAYS
OUTSIDE PLAYING!
    We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as
long as we were back when the streetlights came on.
     No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.
     We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps
and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes.
After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the
problem.
     We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no
video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no
surround sound, no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet or
Internet chat rooms..........WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and
found them!
     We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and
there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
     We made up games with sticks and tennis balls and ate
worms and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very
many eyes, nor did the worms live in us forever.
     We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked
on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them!
     Little league had tryouts and not everyone made the
team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine
that!!
     The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law
was unheard of. They actually sided with the law!
     This gene! ration has produced some of the best
risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!
     The past 50 years have bee an explosion of innovation
and new ideas.
     We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and
we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL!

OOOHHH RSM!

So its lunch and I'm "blogging".  I go to visit the infamous RSM as usual, for she always makes me laugh.  So in reading her post for today, I suddenly have "nightmares" of the "Lucifer" in our family and I decided to tell this story....

You see, I didn't care for him much either.  Lucifer was a good name for him, for sure