FW: Two cute stories

Have a good laugh!!!!

A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day.
Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he
looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now
that Grandpa went to heaven?"

Grandma replied, "Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom
and watch it all day long. The religious programs make me feel good and
the comedies make me laugh. I'm happy with my TV as my boyfriend."

Grandma turned on the TV, and the reception was terrible. She started
adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she
started hitting the backside of the TV hoping to fix the problem.

The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door
and there stood Grandma's minister. The minister said, "Hello son, is
your Grandma home?"The little boy replied, "Yeah, she's in the bedroom
bangin' her boyfriend."

The minister fainted.

Now, that is funny.....I don't care who you are!

------------------------------------------------------------------------ --

Baptizing a Drunk > >
> > A man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when > >
> > he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. > >
> > He proceeds to walk into the water and subsequently bumps > >
> > into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost > >
> > overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon he asks the > >
> > drunk, "Are you ready to find Jesus?" > >
> > The drunk answers, "Yes, I am." So the preacher > >
> > grabs him and dunks him in the water. > >
> > He pulls him up and asks the drunk, > >
> > "Brother, have you found Jesus?" > >
> > The drunk replies, "No, I haven't found Jesus." > >
> > The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him > >
> > into the water again for a little longer. > >
> > He again pulls him out of the water and asks again, "Have > >
> > you found Jesus, my brother?" > >
> > The drunk again answers, "No, I haven't found Jesus." > >
> > By this time the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the > >
> > drunk in the water again -- - but this time holds him down > >
> > for about 30 seconds and when he begins kicking his arms > >
> > and legs he pulls him up. > >
> > The preacher again asks the drunk, "For the love of > >
> > God, have you found Jesus?" > >
> > The drunk wipes his eyes and catches his breath and says > >
> > to the preacher, > >
> > * > >
> > * > >
> > * > >
> > "Are you sure this is where he fell in?" > >
> >
> >
> > Give me a sense of humor, Lord, > >
> > Give me the grace to see a joke, > >
> > To get some humor out of life, > >
> > And pass it on to other folk!

Comments

[Laura]

ROFL